Monthly Archives: September 2021

10 Songs to Add to Your Playlist for September

This blog is officially a year old. 

I am satisfied with the base line of what this blog has become within the first year. I did not hit all of my goals of posting consistently, but I didn’t give up on writing when I missed weeks either (that’s a win in my book).

My goal for the second year of this blog is to grow my audience. This first week of September has been a lot of positive self-talk and pumping myself up. 

Remembering to focus on the goal when all I really want to do is give up.

This month of September has been testing me more than usual and it is only the first week.

I am sharing these 10 songs with you because they have helped me get through this very frustrating start to the month. Enjoy:

Gotta Get Through This – Remix – Daniel Bedingfield

**Listen to this song when you need an early 00’s nostalgic boost of energy to get through something in life

All of the Time – Jungle

**Listen if you need sudden a song that will instantly put you in a good mood

Just Fine – Mary J Blige

**Listen to this bop if you want to feel empowered

Beethoven – Kenndog

**Listen if you are looking for a new rap artist to listen to

September – Earth, Wind, & Fire

**Listen if you are actually happy September is here and ready for autumn weather

Deep Reverence – Big Sean, Nipsey Hussle

**Listen if you are still not convinced you should be listening to Big Sean (because you should)

Lost Ones – Lauryn Hill

**Listen to this song if you need a reason to feel compelled to revisit this *chefs kiss* of an album

Rumors – Lizzo ft Cardi B

**Listen to this song if you are behind in new music, because you should already have this one on your playlist

Bodies – The Knocks ft MUNA

**Listen to this song if you are looking for music that will transport you ahead of time to autumn

It’s Not Right, But It’s Okay – Whitney Houston

**Listen to this song if you need to be reminded that “It’s Not Right, But It’s Okay”

What are some songs that have been getting you through this first week of September? Share with me below in the comments!

*Also if you haven’t already, please subscribe to this blog with your e-mail. Part of growing my audience this year is wanting to grow my e-mail subscribers. If you enjoy what I write, tell a friend about my website today – I’ll be forever grateful!*

Grief is Not Linear

Grief isn’t linear and it f**king sucks. 

When I was younger, 8 years old to be exact – I lost my Pop-Pop to cancer. A concept I couldn’t quite grasp and even though I carried that loss with me throughout my life. I think I was too young to fully understand. Losing him did mean that I only had my Mom-Mom left in the grandparents department as I never had the privilege of meeting my Dad’s parents before they passed. 

Grief is different when you’re a child. 

The impact changes as we grow, but as I’ve said before- never linear and ultimately feels like each loss we experience is connected like a spider web. 

I remember the sunken feeling I felt when I was in my early twenties and experienced grief in a different way. The news hit me like a ton of bricks. My childhood friend had passed away at the mere age of 23. A woman I admired, a bright light on this earth with one of the kindest & loving families. 

That hurt, for years and it still does. 

Five years ago last week I lost my Mom-Mom and despite the time that has passed – the impact still comes in tidal waves of emotion. She was my rock, the person I talked to on the phone with every day (on my ridiculous 3 hr round trip commutes to work from South Philly to Germantown via Septa and A LOT of walking), and the woman that believed in me unconditionally & loved me just the same. 

There is a memory her and I both cherished that we reminisced about often. It was from when I was younger and I would stay over at her house on the weekends. One of those days we happened to be sitting out on the porch looking up to the sky and suddenly what felt like magic – swarms of golden monarch butterflies appeared. As they migrated above our heads we counted well over 100. Nature’s work of art.

When she got sick five years ago, it all seemed to happen quickly and suddenly. I remember it was right around my birthday and I was at my sister’s visiting my nephew. I promised my Mom-Mom I would make a stop back home to see her before returning to the city. Something in my gut made me feel like I should surprise her a day early. 

I was twenty minutes from home when my uncle called. They had taken her to the hospital and it wasn’t good. My insides suddenly felt like a million pretzel knots and I lost the ability to remember how to breathe. The plans had changed and I was to meet my other sister at the hospital, so we could go in to see her with my aunt and uncle. 

My gut instincts knew heartbreak was near, and that the time I had left with my Mom-Mom was limited.

For two nights I stayed with her in the hospital, not wanting to leave her side – I wanted her to know I was there, even if she wasn’t completely lucid. I didn’t want her to wake up and be alone. Growing up she made it her mission to know she was always there for me, I couldn’t bare the thought of leaving her by herself.

When the time did come that week when I had to leave to go back to the city, it was one of the hardest things I ever had to do and still to this day that remains true. 

I knew when I looked her in her eyes and she looked back at me. That was going to be the last time we exchanged “I love yous” face to face. And it was. 

Grief is a roller coaster that you ride blindly. 

That week was difficult – being alone was the worst and work was more of a reminder than a distraction. I was able to talk to her twice that week on the phone to hear her voice, which felt like a gift in itself. But then that day at the end of August came and my phone rang. She was gone. 

No matter what people speak of losing a loved one – the hard truth is this: it never gets easier, you learn to live with the grief. 

And there are times when something important happens and I have to remind myself she isn’t a phone call away anymore.

There are no answers, there is just love and the impact of that love that we all carry with us from those that we have lost along the way.

Grief isn’t linear and may be infinite, but the love that remains within us knows no bounds.